1:51 PM EST, February 12, 2013
I never actually said that...until my husband and I seperated. Now I'm throwing the Dad word around like crazy. Solo parenting, even if your Ex is totally in it, ain’t easy.
The day to day doesn’t bother me so much. Most busy families don’t have two parents standing by to thoughtfully tag team every issue. Definitely not in our former household. But now, I’m actually alone in this. Seems like every “no” is an invitation for Spider-Man (AKA The Kid) to play hardball.
Not too long ago, for the first time in my child’s three long years of schooling, I did the walk of shame to the Main Office to sign the TARDY register. I could feel the scarlet letter burning through my dirty coat.
We weren’t 10 minutes late.
We were AN HOUR AND A HALF late.
On a Field Trip day.
The bus was waiting. Why? Because I just couldn’t deal. I’m not lazy or overly permissive, and although my kid might disagree, I am a fairly level-headed parent. But not today. On my 66th attempt to get the Spidey’s ass in gear, I just walked away. It was the power struggle to end all power struggles. And I crumbled under the pressure. Desperate, I did an actual video conference with the BFF, my parent-hero-child-whisperer. Spider-Man was dug in for the long haul.
So then I start calling Dad for back up.** The first few times it went ok. Then Dad gets all pissy and I’m all like, “What?” and he’s all like “I’m not going to be the heavy” and I’m all like
“But we’re still his parents” ... and then... wait for it...
“WE are not,” says Dad.
While I totally think this is still the wrong answer, and I know he meant if for petty stuff, not, say, joining the circus, he’s kinda got a point.
Is there really such thing as distance co-parenting? What does that even mean?
What’s the new dynamic?
Please, tell me. ‘Cause I don’t know!
**PRO TIP: Have your Ex text your kid NO for added reading practice.
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