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Crime & Punishment: Yale is on the Lookout For the 'Poopetrator'
Apparently, you can be the type of person who squats over a washing machine to drop turds on a stranger's clothing and still get into Yale. A menace students have deemed “the Poopetrator” has “repeatedly defecated” into campus washers and dryers, reports the Yale Daily News. “I simultaneously wanted to throw up, cry and punch someone,” said Andrea Fleming, who opened a dryer to an unpleasant surprise. She apparently marched into her dorm's administrative office, evidence in hand, to demand something be done. Sophomore David Steiner told the New Haven Register, “Everyone is talking about the Poopetrator. People are talking about him or her in their rooms, at the dinner table and in the laundry rooms.” (Really? At dinner?) He says students no longer leave their laundry unattended. Yet the shitstorm continued when a clothesline of brown-stained towels and T-shirts was hung between two lightposts in the middle of the night. Someone claiming to be the Poopetrator emailed a photo of the display to several students. Commenters on the Daily News' website were skeptical. “Def not dookie,” wrote one. “I would be envious of anyone that could produce such consistent coloring within a sample this large.”
By Nick Keppler
October 8, 2013