Marriage is like Comcast cable. At first you’re seduced with promises of great deals and special channels. A year later you’re paying twice as much, you don’t get Showtime anymore, and you can’t leave without paying a huge cancellation fee. That’s why it was nice to see this feature in yesterday’s New York Times about four guys who have chosen to live together well into their 30s in order to pursue their career goals.
Sociologically, the men represent the apotheosis of two trends in American life. The most recent census figures suggest that many people do not want to live alone; they prefer or need the company: The number of roommates in nonfamily households in New York City increased by more than 40 percent between 2000 and 2010. At the same time, Americans, especially men, have been pushing back the age at which they first marry — for men, it climbed to 28.2 years in 2010, up from 26.8 a decade earlier.
“We’ve somehow drifted into this place where we are really close, and care about each other deeply, and yet we give each other lots of space and stay out of each other’s daily business,” said Mr. Brown, a senior editor at VH1, the cable network. “We’ve got all the benefits of a family with very little of the craziness that normally comes along with them,” he added.
A few years ago, before I “settled down,” I moved into one of the downtown Hartford apartment buildings with my old college roommate. Half the building thought we were a gay couple. We've gotten so progressive when it comes to things like race or gender, but when it comes to two 28-year old guys living together, they must be gay, otherwise they'd be living in Avon with their fiances and going to dinner parties. We had the last laugh though, because it was a fantastic year. We had parties all the time, we made tons of friends and our lives were awesome. Plus, the other nice thing was, my roommate was a pretty good-looking guy. If people are going to think I’m gay, I at least want them to think I have high standards.
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